i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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