16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Two words: blizzard sex
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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