Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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