Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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