You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
