I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
It's shark week go big or go home
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
