another moral hangover. fuck.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
