Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Church boner. Awkwardddd
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
