Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
