I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
