I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
