You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
