My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
