Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Randomize
