So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize