I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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