If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
