Sponge bath it is.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
