You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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