i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
