how can u be prego again
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
