For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize