fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Verdict: uncircumcised.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
