i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
