STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Someone shattered a urinal.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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