Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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