He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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