He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
