you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
