dude i'm inner monologue high
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
