it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
