and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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