I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Is Oprah even human
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
