we're chasing vodka with high fives
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Sorry about my life...
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
