put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
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