Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Welp...herpes.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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