I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize