Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
