I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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