He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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