Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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