Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
