I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
