Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
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