oh god the rape fog is back!
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
