I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
