Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
