Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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