absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
