Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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