Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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