yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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